Guys — it’s June! If you can believe it, the summer is already here. With the summer comes outdoor drinking, summer Fridays, and a host of other opportunities to make your destiny and your drink of choice coincide. Read on for a personalized drink pairing for your June horoscope. Bottoms up!
Clear a path — universe Gemini is dancing through June Gangnam-style, woop, woop woop, woop, woop woop! This is your month of high fives and total accomplishments! Your patron planet Saturn is dancing with Venus. Congrats — whatever you have been doing to get to this point has paid off and it’s time to relish in it. Uranus is twerking up on Neptune, which will give you the freedom to take a vacation or use your free time to help a friend in a new venture while knowing that your money is long and strong. Enjoy this cosmic energy in June and go out and be social! It’s spring, so indulge in the wonders of a chilled Beaujolais. Chilled red, you ask? Why, hell yes! Bright, vibrant, and red, this French wonder, made from the Gamay grape, is filled with fresh fruit flavors and a touch of violets. It’s low in alcohol, so have a few with your crew.
What’s up there, autonomous prime? You will step in neither rain puddle nor pothole this month. You’re running on cruise control; without even thinking about it things will just fall into place for you this month. Good news, right? Don’t get ahead of yourself, though, and ponder this too much. Just listen to your inner biological hum to guide you. You will spend the next few weeks being pulled by the dark moon. It’s O.K. — that is a good thing. The moon emits positive vibes and when it’s dark it just means it’s running in the background like a GPS app. So while you’re walking through sun showers and missing those dips in the road, make yourself a Light and Stormy. Find some light rum, good quality ginger beer, and ripe lime. Pour the rum over ice and top off with ginger beer and fresh-squeezed lime juice. Sip and soak up the confidence.
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Out with the old and in with the new, dear Lion. It’s time to molt like a cosmic snake. The sun and Venus are strong in your sign this month, which will give you all the energy you need to take on new projects. But you can’t please everyone, even though I know that is how you’re wired. It may be time to end a relationship, whether it be in business or personal life, but that’s just how the cookie crumbles and the universe rumbles, am I right? With your lion’s heart, you’ll be able to cut ties in the best way without burning bridges. Stay focused, because Uranus and Mercury are in a negative space this month and if you let your feeling get the best of you they may eclipse your inner sun. Stay confident this month with a flinty, crisp, and linear Sancerre. This purest expression of Sauvignon Blanc is filled with slight notes of citrus and bracing, self-assured minerality of wet rock pulled from a babbling brook. Solid as a rock, just like you in June.
You have been given the role of the great communicator in June, dear Virgo. You’re like Ari Gold sans misogynistic prattle about to take on one of the biggest mediator situations this year. Tensions will run high but people will be counting on you for sage advice and corrective maneuvering, which I know you love. The good news is that you will be a mere observer of said tension, but don’t let the social side of life skew you to one side or the other. Beware the passion in your soul to resolve this issue and focus only on the facts, Joe Friday-style. Neptune is pushing on you this month, and if you’re not careful you could get flooded with bad mojo. Keep your warring parties calm and focused with the soothing smokiness of a good dram or three of mezcal made from the most sacred agave plant. It is said that lightning struck an agave plant, cooking it and releasing its juices. From then on it was known as the elixir of the gods. Hold forth your counsel dear Earth Sign. You got this.
In the words of Riri, “Shine bright like a diamond.” This month you are the most brilliant star in the sky, but not for the world to see — for you to see. That’s right, Air Sign, it’s time to balance your scale and transition form social skills to independence. With stubborn Saturn being calmed by the vibrant sun, you’ll be able to concentrate on yourself while maintaining friendships because with all the planets moving into your northern sector, everyone will respect what you’re doing and be there when you’re ready to re-download your Facebook app. Your money is looking good this month, so treat yourself to a nicer bottle of Cognac. Sip an inch or two before bed to contemplate the day, taking in the floral, fruity caramel of this French eau de vie.
Keep up the good work, Scorpio! That montage you had last month really worked and you’re about to have one of the best months this year to date. Don’t get ahead of yourself, though; keep doing what that montage taught you. Master Yoda says, do or do not. There is no try. And wow, you got all kinds of doing going on. Your dark moon is in retrograde, so be aware to be attentive to the people around you while avoiding being overly confident. Let the force of the sun and Venus hold each of your cosmic hands, guiding you to success. Speaking of doing, you will be doing a lot of going out this month, so keep focused and refreshed when you’re out with the always-gratifying and lively Gruner Veltliner. This is the most social of wines in the city of Vienna and is now on almost every wine list stateside. It’s white, crisp, and wafting with lemony life. It’s low in alcohol, too, so you can say hi to everyone with a glass in your hand. Enjoy the fruits of your labor!
Put that arrow back in your quiver, dear Archer, because you’re entering the first month of summer with all star cannons blazing. Whatever relationships you have formed and are on the verge of solidifying, get those social contracts signed. Before the galactic ink dries, you’ll be off on a new adventure like “The Neverending Story“ and your new partner is your luck dragon. This is also a philosophical month for you, so grab your new posse and salon like you’re in Mr. Koreander’s bookstore and share a good bottle of 12 year Scotch whisky. It’s soft but slightly sharp from youth and swimming with notes of caramel and whirling with the peaty smoke of the ages. Enjoy the journey!
Ruled by Saturn at night, you sit on the moon quietly playing your fiddle, observing the Earth below, planning your next move. You see all the paths ahead and think you can walk them all in unison. Well, this month, you just might be able to do so if you keep focused and stay kind. Jupiter is your warring planet in June and will bring the profit you have been seeking, although I know you will always seek more, you crazy Earth Sign. In addition, you will achieve the relationships you desire and the respect of your peers. Stay kind. Let Jupiter be your warrior, not your captor, and jump down off that moon pocket and let’s see how you roll. Practice patience and contemplation with a Black and Tan. Pour half a pint with pale ale and then layer on the stout over the back of a spoon and just breathe.
The sun is strengthening Mercury this month to become your supportive celestial patron, which you will need as a plethora of opportunities run at you like a cosmic river that’s breached its stardust levee. Like Led Zeppelin says, “When the levee break we got no place to go.” That means you. But this is a flood that you should welcome and let wash over you, catching each opportunity in your earthen jar that is your soul, dear Water Bearer. Let them marry and swim among each other, then pour them out in a galactic pool under the light of the dark moon and let the ripples show you the way. Be mindful of Mars, that devil on your shoulder, in June. If he touches that moon, you may lose your way and confusion will rule the day. So stay positive and don’t let the red planet overwhelm you. Speaking of red, summon the carefree calm of the Italian culture with a Negroni: 1 part gin,1 part Campari, 1 part sweet red vermouth. Stir into a glass over ice, garnish with an orange wind twist, and serve … yourself.
This is it. You’re sitting on the edge of one of the biggest deals of your life. You’re about to secure a solid and lengthy source of income that will help provide security going forward for the next projects you have outlined. I’m just so excited for you! As always in these situations, don’t get overconfident, especially if it is a business deal. Wait to celebrate and act like a fool dabbing down the hallway when the deal is sealed. And throw a bottle of well-deserved Vintage Champagne. It’s O.K — you can afford a bottle — maybe two, actually. Stay focused and then let the bubbles FLOW!
This month, your life will feel like a house of cards. There is a fragile balance you will be able to achieve but you need to stay focused and let that focus be your cosmic glue. June has a galactic eye trained on the house of family and you should take advantage of that. Uranus is in retrograde, so you will feel a strain in the friendship department, but the sun is transiting Gemini, symbolizing communication and understanding, so you can keep Uranus in check. I know you totally have like a thousand emails to respond to, but get those replies out of the way before the month gets rolling so you can balance the friends-and-family element and reap the reward of your career when it presents itself. Speaking of balance, indulge in a well-blended red wine in June to add to your harmony, in the form of of of the most famous blends in the world, Bordeaux. Ask your wine merchant to find the right one for you, whether it be powerful and full-bodied or elegant and supple, and sip that cosmic glue.
The cosmos is dosing you with a truth serum this month, you Bullish Rouge. And although you are good at keeping secrets on the DL, you’ll have an almost-irresistible urge to spill the beans this month. Keep it in your diary like Carrie Bradshaw. If you get too close to emotional situations, you may say something you regret later. Like our fave urban memoirist said in Season 2, Episode 12, “I revealed too much, too soon. I was emotionally slutty.” So stay calm this month and keep it like a secret. Speaking of Ms. Bradshaw, mix up a Cosmopolitan to match those hidden gems in your dome. A little vodka, a little cointreau, a dash of lime, and cranberry to mask the subtle bite, and the calm will sneak right up on you.
Listen to the audio of this horoscope read by Keith here: