Let’s be real — we’ve all done it. Online dating is all around us. Between boozed up adventures at the bar on Tinder and crippling evenings involving your friends building OkCupid profiles, the culture is impossible to avoid. It’s fair to say that a lot of these cringe-worthy experiences drive us to compensate with a little drink or two.
But what if the roles were reversed? What if our favorite spirits were looking for love in all of the wrong places? That’s where we come in.
Rum
“I’m just a normal guy looking for a person to chill with. I consider myself pretty likeable, and someone who can say the same is an ideal candidate for me.
Let’s meet up in Venice and search for treasure.”
Tequila
“Let’s cut the sh*t. We both know why we’re on here.
It’s Spring Break in Gulf Shores, so don’t get it twisted. Pillow talk is forbidden. You bring the limes, I’ll bring the salt.”
Vodka
“I’m just a twenty-something looking for that special someone to go out with me on Friday nights.
I like hot summer days, yachts, and all things brunch.”
Bourbon
“I’m a private and simple man so I describe myself as such.
I enjoy the outdoors, hunting, fishing, and sitting in my cabin doing nothing.
That is all.”
Absinthe
“World traveller. Writer. Romantic.
Currently looking for a muse that will inspire me to finish my screenplay.
I don’t believe in labels, only love.”
Gin
“If you can’t tell from my profile, I’ve been through relationship hell. Seriously, is it really that hard to find somebody that can fulfill all of your needs while giving you a little bit of space?
Ugh.”
Amaretto
“The limit of my passion does not exist.
I’m a math professor at a local university and I’m looking for someone who appreciates a wholesome kind of lover with a sweet disposition.”
Limoncello
“Promise me we’ll fib when we tell our future children how we met.
I’m a designer and Pinterest fiend. I’m searching for someone who doesn’t mind a little sass and can enjoy a refreshing walk on a hot summer day.”
Irish Cream
“Hello potential suitors!
I’ve spent a majority of my life helping others and now it’s time to focus on me!
I love to bake and I’m looking for someone who would like to live the sweeter life with me.”