If you’ve ever perused the annals of stock photo galleries, you know that you can find some seriously awkward images. Surely someone, somewhere has a need for stock photos though, right? There must be a reason why “full isolated studio picture from a young woman with toilet paper” exists.

VinePair has spent plenty of time wading through these photos. We’ve even taken advantage of extensive stock galleries with a wine grammar lesson told through stock photos, and a visual telling of “Twas a Wine-Filled Night Before Christmas.”

But as useful as some of those photos can be, some of them make you wonder, “What were they drinking?”

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The model who had one glass of wine too many

Woman who missed her mouth

More wine. Clearly more wine, considering how this model’s last glass went.

The spellbound drunk

Spell Bound Stock Drinker

Expelliarmus! Don’t get distracted by this young man’s extremely strong right hand, or by the light red liquid in his cup. He drinks butterbeer all day, every day.

The lovely beer belly baby

Beer Belly Stock Photo

Beer can make people do some crazy things. It can’t, however, make you pregnant.

The wine drinker who’s “not a snob”

French Wine Snob

He’s not a wine snob; he just wants you to know that French wine is supérieur. Oh, by the way, it’s pronounced cray-mont you brute.

The model whose dry mouth must be so real

Eating toilet paper

Maybe she just had some really acidic Pinot Gris and needed to dry out her mouth. She probably needed something a lot stronger than wine after this was taken, though.

The world is a loud and demanding place

Phone Stock Photo

You know what? Maybe this guy shouldn’t have another drink.

The model who added a little too much sour apple

Stock Bartender

We’re sure that whatever comes out of that cocktail shaker is going to be delicious, but it looks like someone gave her a little too much sour apple mix before taking the photo.

BONUS: This cat

stock photo cat

Milk. He’s drinking milk.