If you have a favorite local watering hole, you know there’s something special about being a regular. Reaching the level where bar staff doesn’t just know your name, but also your order, can be a truly satisfying experience. Good regulars will typically respond in turn, chatting politely with their bartenders when there’s adequate time to do so before always leaving a generous tip. Unfortunately, not all frequent patrons are good regulars, and some might actually behave in a way that lands them firmly in the “bad regular” category.
To learn more about the qualities of these less-than-ideal habitués, we asked bartenders to share some of their biggest pet peeves. And while we’d like to think that no drinker aims to be a poor customer, it’s probably best to avoid any of these practices lest you tick off the staff at a nearby haunt.
From the expectation that you deserve first priority to overstaying your welcome at closing time, here are five signs you’re a bad bar regular, according to bartenders.
Expecting free stuff.
It’s fairly commonplace for restaurant and bar staff to welcome or thank regular patrons with a drink on the house or a comped small plate. That said, regulars who expect this kind of treatment, or act out if they don’t receive it, will likely be perceived negatively by their trusted bartender, according to Cheyenne Paydar, bartender at Same Same Wine Bar.
“I’ve befriended many regulars in the past, but there are times when the relationship is strictly professional,” he explains. “The thing that makes a ‘bad regular’ more than anything, for me, is the manipulation of this relationship for specialized treatment and pushing the boundaries of an egalitarian service model.”
Hogging the bartender’s time — and not even being aware that you’re doing so.
Bartenders work in hospitality — it’s literally their job to converse with patrons and ensure they’re having a nice time. But it’s not their only job, and you’re probably not the only customer in the bar. Don’t force them to talk to you and neglect the rest of their guests. It’s just rude.
“Bad regulars are still regulars, and while sometimes annoying, they do help keep the lights on, and it’s important to recognize that,” explains Ivy Mix, co-owner of Brooklyn’s Whoopsie Daisy and Fiasco! Wine & Spirits. “With that said, some of the ‘bad regulars’ I’ve had in my life are generally the ones that come in and demand too much of your time without understanding that you have other people to serve. The icing on the cake is when these needy customers are also bad tippers.”
Mix also asks bar guests to keep in mind that bartenders are literally stuck behind the bar, often in small spaces. There’s nowhere for them to go if one patron holds them in a captive conversation, even if there are other guests who need to be served. “My advice to people is: If you love your bartender, but they’re busy with someone or something else, just sit to yourself for this round, don’t fuss, and be sure to tip big,” she says.
They abuse their position of power as a guest.
Bars and restaurants, in part, rely on good word of mouth to keep guests coming through the doors. Most visitors know this, and will pass on a positive review when they have a great experience. But if that recommendation is only given upon receiving special treatment — or worse, you give a negative review if you don’t — you might be a bad regular.
“The expectation of constant first priority [is not good],” Paydar explains. “Over the veil between server and guest looms an ever-present threat that if they no longer deem the relationship personally fulfilling, they can turn. A bad Yelp review, bad word of mouth to your peers at other bars, they know the power they hold as guests.”
They camp out at closing time.
At the end of a long work day, there’s nothing employees want to do less than stay at work for longer than needed — especially when those employees work at bars and restaurants open until the wee hours of the morning. When you notice your bartender starting their end-of-the night side work — wiping down bottles, taking the mats off the bar, restocking, etc. — it’s probably best to pay your tab and head home.
“Bad regulars frequently scumbag at the end of the night and can’t understand why the bartenders want to close out and go home,” Mix says. “Please take the hint and go home. You wanted to leave your workplace didn’t you? We also want to leave ours.”
They’re only there to land a date.
We’re all for in-person meet-cutes. Be that as it may, if you’re only frequenting a bar to explore potential romantic connections and hitting on everyone who walks through the doors — staff included — it’s just creepy.
Mix is not a fan of this behavior. “While I am pro meeting someone at a bar rather than online, it’s really annoying to have that regular who has tried to either pick up everyone on staff and/or everyone who comes in,” she says. “Just give it a rest.”
